Navigating the Holidays

I think the holidays are tricky after you are married. There is a lot of running around to various houses, lots of time in the car and the inevitable eating two turkey dinners. (No complaints on the two helpings of apple pie though!) For the first few years of marriage, Chris and I managed to please everyone in both our families. We did two Thanksgivings and spent Christmas running here, there and everywhere in order to keep up a myriad of holiday traditions respected by each family.

But then I had enough. I wanted to sit in peace and eat one turkey without feeling the pressure of time lingering over my mashed potatoes and gravy. I hated that Chris and I woke up Christmas morning, opened each other's gifts in a flash so he could run off to be with his family at his Aunt's house to open up more gifts and I headed to my mother's. Weren't we a family too? Aren't we supposed to create our own traditions?

My holiday discontent spread to Chris once we had Aidan. It's difficult to manage the holiday fast lane as adults, but when you add the needs of small children - it's impossible. We had to find a better solution.

Finally, after ten plus years of marriage, three children and much deliberation - we've negotiated peace. Thanksgiving is with Chris's family. Christmas Eve is with mine. Christmas morning is all our own, but we've invited both sets of parents to join us late morning for a visit. There is no more checking of the watches, fearful we've missed the seating for our second turkey dinner. There is no more dreading the long drive through the snow on Christmas night with some very cranky and overtired kiddies in the car. Our families may not have everything they want, but they have enough to appear happy. (or at least they are keeping their opinions to themselves and that's okay too.)

But this year there is a twist. Not only are we spending Thanksgiving with Chris's family, but we are hosting them too. Thankfully, Chris's mom is handling most of the food, leaving us with the job of drinks, appetizers and cleaning up the abundance of toys exploding across our home. Now I just need to figure out where in the hell I am going to seat fifteen people for dinner at our house. I doubt anyone wants to eat in the playroom amidst lightsabers and legos.